Happy wild card playoff weekend everyone!

In the midst of Winter, after the holidays have passed, it’s easy to focus on the gloominess or the mundane and ordinary.

As we round year 2 of the pandemic, it’s easy to be scared and confused.

I’ve found that if one can focus their attention on resilience in these trying times, it shows that they can handle almost anything-it’s a learned capacity to cope!

Resilience is as important to our well-being as masks are to stop the spread of the coronavirus!

3 Things to remember about resilience (adapted from Linda Graham)

1. Skills and strategies of resilience are always trainable. Every human being learns from experience. Our neuroplasticity ensures that we can learn and change and grow even from -especially from- difficult experiences. We can turn breakdowns into breakthroughs. 

2.  The core of resilience is flexibility. You wouldn’t be in therapy or thinking about therapy if you were not open to testing new theories and ideas in a safe space. People who are resilient remain flexible in how they think about challenges and flexible in how they react to stress.

“How you respond to the issue … is the issue.”

—Frankie Perez, psychologist

3. Choosing how you respond to resilience is essential. When learning any new skill, practice is essential. Over time, these new patterns represent a resilience mindset. We expect to meet any difficulty, any disaster because we know we can.

The Confession

I have a confession to make. I may have written this blog just so I can write about my favorite football team-the Buffalo Bills 🙂

I’ve learned a few things about resilience just by being a part of the Bills community-the mafia is what we call ourselves (without the violence of course)!  

I’ve learned the Bills mafia is like one big happy family. It’s more than a hashtag.

It’s a mindset and a family endeavor.  In the face of adversity, you can always lean on your family-blood or otherwise.

Each weekend, I gather with about 7,000-8,000 people on Facebook (and I hate Facebook) to talk trash about the opposing team, to stare in amazement at the sheer athleticism on display and to comfort each other when the victory is just out of reach. It may be a silly thing but to me it’s become a pigskin beacon of light in the turbulent seas, for storms are something I’ve practiced navigating through for a while now. 

And so can you!

Find an outlet that isn’t about work, family or school. Find a community that is accepting of the unique person that is you (even if your favorite team doesn’t match up with theirs) 🙂 

Let your mask slip off a little if it feels right.

How you can find your own resilience practice

If football is not your preferred choice, join a book club, or sign up for a yoga class. Reengage in the power of touch. And touch  may mean you find a skilled somatic therapist who can teach you things like hand over heart and other compassionate body work.

I provide support, help and healing in person or online at my Richmond, Virginia practice. I provide hypnotherapy via Zoom worldwide! You can schedule a free consultation here!